Will and Owen have both been in a soccer camp put on by the Brilla Soccer Ministries. I'll interject here with how GREAT the Brilla players and coaches are. If you haven't heard of them, google it and read all about them. It's a semi-pro soccer team and they are based out of Clinton. The players are the coaches for this skills camp that Will and Owen have been going to, and they are great. They are great teachers, patient and funny and all around terrific at teaching soccer to kids but mostly on doing it in a way that is fun and encouraging. That leads us to last night, the final night of the skills camp. The kiddos played 3 on 3 games to put into practice all that they've learned. I'd like to say the McCleeses went out strong, but I'd be smooth lying. The McCleeses went out tired from a short nap and long holiday weekend spent swimming and playing. Owen went out grouchy. Will didn't complain but was moving slow. The first half was pretty painful on our end. Will was just slow moving and kept wanting to come off in the middle of plays for water. Owen was just pouting. I realized later that I'd done a poor job preparing him for a game, since this was his first one. (Ex. He got his feelings hurt when they asked him to play goalie b/c he felt like the rest were leaving him behind. Then when he tripped in a pack of kids all trying to get the ball, he thought they were being mean pushing him down). It took a good while, and some exceptional patience and help from the Brilla guys, but Owen eventually caught on and started playing hard and better. I think he'll catch on as we play more from now on. The big story of the night though, was Will. While there were certainly other players on the field playing "tougher" and more "aggressive"...we ended up very proud of how Will got after the ball and didn't just hang back on the sidelines as characteristic of past years of soccer. He got in and gave some solid effort and was able to make a goal. The best part of the night, though, was that Will got named MVP of his team!!!! I could have cried on the spot. For reasons I'll explain below (and that most of you know), his confidence on the field of any sport is low. He wasn't even sure he wanted to do soccer again after last year, but decided to do it since Owen was out there. To be named MVP to him is ROCKSTAR status. He got a Newks cup (among some other little prizes) that we should now call the "golden goblet" because he insists on drinking out of it for all meals (it's one of those big black ones the size of his head). He woke up still strutting this morning. As I woke up this morning, looking back over the pictures from last night...something about this picture with his Brilla coaches...
reminded me of this picture from almost 4 years ago...
When Will had two broken legs within one year and spent an entire summer in a full body cast. When he was just out of a body cast and barely able to walk, much less run. He finished the 50 yard dash in this picture a full minute after every other kid had crossed the line. But you know what that precious child with his slow moving walk did? He finished. Not aggressively and not fighting for the win. But with focus and intention that you can see on that sweet face. I think he might just be the one "fighting the hardest." After that cast, while his 3 year old friends were learning to ride bikes with training wheels and kick a ball and swim, Will was having to "push reset" physically. This time 3 years ago, Will was, for the second time in his life, still trying to turn his limped walk into something that resembled a run. And so on the athletic field, Wes and I've struggled as we've watched him be fearful of getting in after a ball, or get tired faster than others might and just generally have a frustrating and hard time all around athletically.So you can see why his getting MVP last night meant so much to him. And it meant so much to us as parents to see his physical confidence shoot to the sky. But this morning I realized some other lessons from last night. As I think of all the things I was yelling at him ("fight for the ball! get in there and take it! take it to the goal!!"), I realized that while it is good for him to be pushed athletically and I want him to learn to "fight for the ball" (of any sport!) with confidence, what I really want for him is to know perseverance. And as I stood back and looked at him today, I realized how blessed I am to have a child who knows at least as much, if not more than, I do about perseverance. After a miserable year last year of playing soccer and being slower and not making a goal, he showed back up well this year for Brilla. And is already talking about practicing this summer so he can try league soccer again this fall. But more than that, I see him swimming bravely, running and jumping and trying all kinds of new things. I watched with pride at Field Day when he came up to me after a few events saying "Mom, why do I keep losing the racing events?" but never once hesitated to jump right in and do the next event (the kid can do obstacle courses and sack jumps, now!) with his whole heart.
Which brings me to the question in my blog title, do I want him to succeed or overcome? Do I want to succeed or overcome? This is, to me, a spiritual question that God has been addressing with both myself and Wes. I view success in the worldly sense (and sports for my kids falls here, in case I am not making a clear application). Following someones set rules, being the best, attaining status...are all part of being successful. And there is nothing ultimately wrong with wanting to be successful. But spiritually being an overcomer means to hear God's voice, then to follow it in obedience and perseverance. It means to endure to the end. It is the daily (as in truly day, after day, after day) decision to follow God's will for my life, even when it looks vastly different from the success of the world. One of the lessons I've gleaned about perseverance from Will's relearning to walk is that is simply was. There weren't rules and playbooks to learn, just like there are not right and wrong ways of religion. There is simply focus on what had to happen that day to get to an end result that mattered greatly. I feel like I'm sort of rambling, so I'll try to wrap up and pray the application hits however it needs to for each person. Just like there are the kids who play the best on a sports team by all team standards, there are kids who play well because they persevere and don't quit. It's not the glamorous way to take, but it is the way we teach our kids the kind of character that will carry them to the next example (of course, many of "the best athletes" also have the character I'm talking about). As adults, we can keep striving to be the best by society rules and playbooks, or we can persevere and not quit as we look to be daily overcomers who are striving for a greater goal. We'd certainly like for our lives as overcomers to include worldly "success," but the daily striving to be in God's will and doing as He wants for us will far outlast any worldly success. Just like we, as parents, desire for Will and Owen to have a focus on discipline, character and perseverance more than any certain set of athletic rules, God as our Father desires us to have a focus on His Will and run with discipline, character and perseverance FAR more than He desires us success by the world's rules.
The last lesson from soccer is this. As the coaches noticed that Owen was having a hard time getting into the game and understanding what was supposed to be happening, one of the head coaches came in and stood beside him. I heard him say "Hey Owen, let's do this together. You hang with me and watch what I do!" (it worked!)
How much 1) does God say that to us daily and 2) should we be coming alongside others, including our kids, saying the same thing!!! Telling each other and our kids every day, ESPECIALLY the hard days, "hang with me and we'll do this together." Or listen with our ears and heart as we hear God say "Melissa (or you!), I know yesterday was hard and today you are barely crawling...but let's do this together!"Therefore, since we are surrounded by such a great cloud of witnesses, let us throw off everything that hinders and the sin that so easily entangles, and let us run with perseverance the race marked out for us.
